Moments

Nicole had clinic today (8-29-14) just to check her platelet count.  Her platelets were at 32 which means she didn't need a transfusion today.  The labs they drew a few days ago to see if they could figure out what was wrong with her platelets got contaminated somehow.  They drew more again today so hopefully we will soon figure out what is going on.    They also looked at her GVHD rash and they feel it looks the same.  They want me to put her steroid cream on three times a day instead of just twice.

When I found out we were going to have a surprise package in 2011, I had a lot of emotions.  I was 40 and my youngest child was 7.  I then thought I would have the privilege of being able to rock the baby and spend a lot of time with this little one.  It had been 19 years since I only had one baby to care for.  At the time I didn't know the roller coaster we were about to get on.  I didn't know that I would have months where I couldn't hold her because she was so sick.  I didn't know that I wouldn't have the quiet nights in the rocking chair where I could nurse in the quiet of the house and just snuggle. I didn't know how much Leukemia would steal from us.  However, this journey is a reminder to find the joy.  Life is made up of little moments.  The other day was one of those moments; I actually had a shower uninterrupted.  I so enjoyed it!!  But my motherly instinct had me wondering what I would find when I got out:)  Nicole was happily sitting on her bed putting band-aids on her arms, legs, shirt, and my favorite, her head.  I love these moments of normalcy of having a toddler!

Elder Ballard once said:  "recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction." (https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2008/04/daughters-of-god?lang=eng)